Day 3 after last chemo treatment

My chemo on Friday went well. When I was all done they gave me a "chemo cake" and a certificate that was signed by several of the nurses and a book about life after treatment. It was very nice . . . they are such a great group of people at the cancer center.

I've had a couple of pretty rough days emotionally. I know not everyone is like me in the emotions department, but I gotta tell you guys, it's really bad for me. Thank goodness I'm on the upswing of the emotions part of it now. I suppose it would be bad enough if it were only the cancer and chemo I was dealing with, but add in all the other things that are going on in my life and boy can it be overwhelming.

This is one reason it takes me a few days to write after chemo. For one thing I can't stop crying long enough to write. For another thing if I actually wrote in any detail about how I was feeling, thinking, etc., someone would surly send over the guys with the white wrap around suits who would take me to a rubber room!! Yes, honestly it can get that bad.

For all of you that have known or will know anyone in the future going through this or anything like it . . . please know it's probably much worse for them at times than anyone . . . even their immediate family . . . will ever know. Why is this . . .well for me it's because I try to be strong for the most part and usually fall apart when no one is around or in the middle of the night when everyone is sleeping. If they do catch me crying or having a hard time, I know it's very hard for them because they want to help but there is really not much they can do. Mostly it helps if they just listen . . . and a hug, a really long hug . . . like just holding them for a while, can have a great relaxing effect. Well, unless they are not huggers and although it's very hard for me to believe, there are people out there that are not huggers!!!!

I need to eat and try to get some rest. I will write more later.

Keep Smilin'
Wendy